Wednesday, November 01, 2017

In summary

Dua bulan lagi berakhirlah tahun 2017.  
Buat masa ini;

1. Fasa terakhir Fellowship FRACGP. Doakan.

2. Tahun depan berpindah tempat kerja. Akan meninggalkan hospital dan klinik sekarang ke klinik yang lebih kecil lagi, tapi lebih dekat dengan rumah. 

Akan meninggalkan acute care buat sementara dan fokus kepada primary care.

3. Mikhail sudah ada lebih 80+ patah perkataan. Forming simple sentences dalam 3-4 patah perkataan. Makin kurang stereotyping behavior. Gemar bermain role-play. Curious dan suka bertanya. Tetapi masih ada beberapa elemen perkembangan sosial yang belum berkembang.

Kalau dalam kelompok besar seperti tadika/playground, dia akan main dalam dunia dia sendiri, atau memerhati dari jauh dan akan main selepas itu. Kadang-kadang dia akan buat-buat tak peduli orang di tepinya; tapi ekor matanya sering menjeling dan observe. Akan lari kalau ditegur/disapa.

Kalau dalam kumpulan kecil (2-3orang kawan), dia akan lebih confident untuk berinteraksi, tetapi akan 'mencuri' beberapa minit untuk menyendiri/menyorok, sebelum join semula. Sepertinya komunikasi dengan orang itu melelahkan agaknya, perlu recharge semula. Kitar ini biasanya seperti berikut 20min main- 5min solo - ulang.

Makin behave, boleh tunggu giliran, boleh sit down, tapi tak lebih dari 10-20minit. Kalau ada aktiviti sosial/urusan rasmi yang perlukan lebih masa; perlu ada strategi untuk 'mengisi' kebosanan. Semasa fasa 2-3 tahun; jangan harap boleh makan di restaurant. Waiting in line for ticket/boarding airplane is a nightmare. Sekarang ini bolehlah sikit-sikit. Kami masih menolak/tapis pelawaan kawan-kawan untuk makan di luar atas sebab ini. Harap tidak kecil hati.

4. Andika is growing ever so fast! Selalu bergaduh dengan Mikhail, berebut mainan, dan selalunya tidak nampak sebarang tanda yang Andika akan mengalah. Dia lawan balik. Very cheeky, suka mengusik abangnya. Manja dengan mamanya.

Andika is not a picky eater, unlike his brother. Both of them love fruits. 

Andika likes to build things while Mikhail prefers to animate his toys. So the typical scenario in our house is; Andika will architect the diorama and Mikhail will fill it in with his trains and figures(?Inception :D). They don't usually talk to each other though. And in the end, both of them will turn into Godzilla and destroy the whole things. Leaving us zombie-faced parents to clean-up the mess. 

We need some discipline with these boys! 

Tahun depan kami rancang hantar Andika ke day-care untuk sehari. Cuba-cuba. 

5. We are torn in between building a house here in the regional area or buying a house/unit in the city. I'm feeling the pressure to own a house here. For security purposes. So far we have secured property in Malaysia but not here. I guess it is a big decision to make and long-term repayment to commit to after all. 

Saliza is still keeping the option of going back after 2020 and therefore she is pushing for making more investment in Malaysia. I, on the other hand, was thinking of residing here for awhile and having Malaysia as our retirement plan. 

We will see.

6. It has been awhile since I do something that interest me. I haven't had activities that I could call hobbies for awhile.  I haven't touch a book (other than medical literature) for ages, my car is as boring as fish, I sold my DSLR,  I'm way out of shape, I couldn't attend my karate classes ;Life seems to ceased to be my own. 

But I guess ; so is Saliza. And so are thousands of young parents everywhere. 

Regret? No. 

I guess we both made conscious decision in shifting our priority. 

The early phases of parenting were not all morning-glory. It was literally gloomy and in fact quite depressing. Exhausted physically and emotionally-drained. We both in a mess. Everything seems to be a routine and house works were back-breaking chores. We thought that our 'me-time' was our way to recharge  ourselves but, frankly, it was our attempt to run away from problems in retrospect. We made excuses and began finger-pointing.

So what had happened?

We sat and talked. Many times. Countless of times. We did soul-searching and pray. We argued and reconciled. We didn't tell our parents because, well, both of my parents had gone through enough during their recent separation and both of Saliza's parents are no longer with us.  

Much later it dawn to us that ; nurturing our kids and guiding their young minds is our project. Seeing them achieving things even as menial as learning new words everyday will mean a whole new world to us. 

It was not too far to say that we saw the world quite differently from there.

Short trip to the mall to do groceries was probably a dreadful thing in the past, but now we see this as learning opportunities for the kids to learn new veges/fruits and things and for them to take some responsibilities like carrying the fruits, learn to count with the eggs, paying the cash to cashier girl (Mikhail's favourite) or even just simply pushing the cart around. 

Suddenly everything seems to be an opportunity and little mundane things like splashes of water from Andika's  jumping boot (Peppa Pig's influence) was a joy to behold and a source of perpetual wonder.

I did not say that everything went all right just like that. No. We still have our bad days. We still argue. Mikhail and Andika still throwing their tantrums and having meltdowns; but hey, I guess we could say that we are happier now.

I guess we could now say that we want to do this because we want it; not because we have to do it.


And for that; I honestly could not ask for more.







" Poor and content is rich, and rich enough!" Othello Act 3, Scene 3



A074


Dan juga mereka (yang diredhai Allah itu ialah orang-orang) yang berdoa dengan berkata: "Wahai Tuhan kami, berilah kami beroleh dari isteri-isteri dan zuriat keturunan kami: perkara-perkara yang menyukakan hati melihatnya, dan jadikanlah kami imam ikutan bagi orang-orang yang (mahu) bertaqwa.  

Surah Furqan: Ayat 24




Wednesday, December 28, 2016

2017

Tahun 2016 bakal berakhir dalam masa 3 hari lagi. 
Selamat datang 2017.

Tahun 2016 adalah tahun yang mencabar.

Tahun pertama beranak dua. Andika lahir bawa kegembiraan dan kebahagiaan.


Mikhail perlukan terapi berkala utk speech delay dan autism spectrumnya/asperger (alhamdulillah ada progress, inshaAllah ada satu posting khas nanti). Cabarannya bukan kepalang, tapi kami redha dan bersyukur. Mama and papa love you Mikhail!

Kami juga menghadapi keadaan ekonomi keluarga yang tak menentu. 

Dan berakhir dengan penceraian ibu dan ayah awal bulan Disember. Sedih! Tapi, jika itu yang terbaik, aku mohon Allah SWT lapangkan hidup dan berkati umur kedua orang tuaku. 

Dari segi kerjaya, aku sangat berpuas hati dengan pengalaman dan environment kerja yang stimulating dan juga rewarding. InshaAllah akan memasuki fasa akhir Master dan juga Fellowship tahun depan.

...

2016 berlalu dengan memori pahit dan manis. 

Aku bersyukur pada Allah SWT yang sentiasa menunjukkan jalan keluar, 'menegur' mana yang silap dan memberi 'peluang' memperbaik mana yang kurang.

Aku berterima kasih pada isteriku yang tersayang, kerana sanggup bersama menghadapi semua ini. Terima kasih! Engkaulah kekuatanku. Engkaulah segalanya. 

2016 masa kita banyak dihabiskan di rumah. InshaAllah untuk 2017, harapnya lebih aktif dan amal keluarga bertambah gencar! 

Kita mohon padaNya, dan kembalikan semua padaNya.

I have a good feeling about this one!




Sunday, October 16, 2016

After a while

"You look like the Asian version of Harry Potter " my nurse mentioned to me suddenly last week.


Saturday, July 23, 2016

Rumah baru

Minggu depan pindah rumah.

Daerah sebelah. Dekat sikit dengan play school, tadika dan sekolah.


Sunday, May 01, 2016

Source: google images

Thursday, February 04, 2016

Kemeja kerja berhabuk

"Abang gemuklah dalam dua tiga bulan lepas kahwin. Lepas tu kuruslah balik. Nanti orang cakap syg pandai jaga laki."

And so I agreed. As planned.

It was the biggest mistake. Ever!

Hahah.

In terms of food and diet, I think I'm all right. We don't really eat outside. Take-aways and comfort foods are a rarity. 

The main culprit, as I see it, is my sedentary lifestyle.

I have skipped, almost unintentionally, most of my meals during the day and eat them during dinner time. If I'm on-call, I'll wait until the shift is over and then eat.

After that I will fall asleep. Straight.

Plus, I'm not as active as before. Running around the house for awhile with Mikhail doesn't really count, I guess.

And thus it was, over 3 years of happy and blissful life (and counting InshaAllah), I have successfully accrued 20kg of weight in excess. 

Bravo! 

This has to be addressed. 

For that I have devised a cunning plan to shed this muffin belly of mine and, hopefully, will restore the glory days of 'Kemeja kerja saiz S - Slim fit', eventually.

Wish me luck ! 





Saturday, January 09, 2016

Mikhail dan Andika

Sebenarnya, antara topik utama perbualan aku dan isteri dua tiga bulan sebelum kelahiran Andika adalah ;

Apakah agaknya reaksi Mikhail terhadap adik barunya nanti?

Aku dan isteri telah merencanakan pelbagai pelan dan 'step' supaya Mikhail rasa tak terkejut dan, yang paling utama, tak rasa 'tersisih'.

Maklumlah, dua tahun jadi 'centre of attention'. Mesti ada rasa cemburu. 

Dan apa yang kami jangka memang akhirnya terjadi.

Sehari dua yang pertama bolehlah Mikhail peluk-peluk dan cium-cium. Masuk hari ketiga dan keempat, dia sudah mula menjadi territorial.

Mutakhir, dia mudah tantrum. Kadang-kadang tanpa ada sebab munasabah. Buatlah dan pujuklah macam mana sekalipun; ada sahaja yang tak kena.

It broke my heart seeing him this way. Masuk hari ini, dah dua hari Mikhail tak main kejar-kejar dan hide-and-seek dengan aku; yang mana ia adalah rutin kami anak beranak hampir setiap hari. 

Akhirnya kami sedar; ini adalah fitrah.

Dan apa yang kami cuba buat setiap hari dan setiap detik adalah memberikan kasih sayang yang tak berbelah-bagi untuk kedua-duanya.

Hai anak; untukmu bulan dan bintang!


Gambar: Mikhail merajuk. Hampir sejam aku pujuk ajak main kejar-kejar. Jangankan nak turun katil, tengok aku pun dia tak mahu.