Nama

Pilih-pilih nama anak ni seronok juga.

*chuckles

"..aku menulis, bukan kerna nama"

Ramli Sarip - Bukan Kerana Nama

Taqarrub ilallah

Ada tiga event besar yang bakal berlaku dalam tiga bulan yang mendatang, InshaAllah:

1. Baby 

2. Pindah rumah baru

3. Pindah hospital baru/naik pangkat

Serabut nak uruskan satu per satu. 

And with these; hail a new milestone in my life.

I could not resist but to ask myself "How about my imaan? 

Has it gotten any better?

Has I clinched up towards God with every minute that passed?" 

I dare do all that may become a man; who dares do more is none -Macbeth, Act 1, Scene 7

Tukya

Aku mahu bina sebuah rumah. 

Sebuah rumah yang dirancang rapi, diperbuat dari bahan berkualiti yang aku pilih sendiri.

Akan aku bina dikit demi dikit, hari demi hari, dengan tulang dan jari-jemari ini.

Rumah itu akan jadi kebanggaanku,

Tempat berlindung anak isteriku, rumah pusaka hingga ke anak cucu.

Biarlah apa orang kata; aku ingin jadi sedegil *Tukya.

*Allahyarham Azizi Hj Abdullah, Seorang Tua di Kaki Gunung.

Man-talk

You know what you're doing is right. 

Stay focused. Push through it. Keep the momentum.

If you can't deal with the 'accessory' matters; leave them be. You can't deal with them all at once anyway. Do what you can, and never ever let your guard down and get distracted from your aim. But, never to forget them altogether, too.

People will criticise and condemn you; let them be. Learn and adapt what you can from them, but never let them bogged you down.

For, in the end, your eventual victory will be the mighty answer to all the critiques, doubts and jeers.  

Remember; 

If you're at loss, you will suffer the consequences alone, not them. You will be blown, disintegrated and vanished into oblivion. Not them.

You have to win. 

That's my straight answer to you.

You have to win this, or die try. 

History will only remember two types of people; the winner and the loser. Nothing in between. And if you fall into this category, remember that you are worthless than the loser, for the history itself will not even try to remember you.

Again, my answer to you is straight and simple.

You have to win.

Or die try.

Frail

I saw an elderly lady today before her surgery; I was doing my pre-anaesthetic assessment and running through the check-list.

I've explained to her and her husband the anaesthetic procedure and answered their questions. She didn't talk much, and appeared to be a but nervous too. 

As I was about to wrap up the session, her husband pulled me to the side and whispered: 

"Please take care of her; She's the only one I got."

His eyes glistened. 

"....I will, Sir."

We had a challenging time balancing her temperamental blood pressure and keeping her adequately sedated throughout the surgery, but she managed to push through, thankfully.

We kept her in ICU post-operatively for closer monitoring and care. I went to see her before going home just now and she looked all right. She opened her eyes a bit when I was fiddling around with her records, managed to gave a faint smile and continued to sleep. 

I left the hospital today, feeling grateful. 

I wonder, will I be the same like the lady's husband when I arrived at that age? Will I be as caring as he is? 

Or, will I be able to do the same to my parents, when they become frail? 

I hope I will. 

I believe I should.

InshaAllah.

Kopi

Tengahari tadi aku ada case presentation untuk para houseman/junior HMO. Sepatutnya turn aku bulan Mac lepas, tapi sebab walimah, aku tangguhkan.

Aku ambil satu kes menarik waktu aku di Emergency Department dulu. Mulanya patient ni datang macam biasa, tapi kemudian deteriorated dengan cepat. 

Aku rasa puas sebab di bahagian discussion, ada beberapa houseman/intern yang bertanyakan soalan-soalan yang padaku sangat praktikal dan relevan. Memang itu yang aku harapkan. Kes yang aku huraikan straight forward, tapi perbincangan tentang management dan treatment plan itu yang aku ingin go in depth. Moga bermanfaat, InshaAllah.

Lepas presentation, aku minum kopi sat. Lega. Rasa hilang satu beban.

Harsh reality

Balik dari hospital, buka pintu rumah; angin sejuk menerpa. Sunyi. 

Lupa. Isteri dah balik Malaysia. 

Masuk bilik tidur, terngiang-ngiang suara isteri memasak di dapur, menjemput makan, menanyakan tentang kerja dan memesan barang dapur yang dah habis.

Sunyi!

One

I have just finished my Advance Paediatric Life Support (APLS) course and successfully passed the exams! 

Alhamdulillah!

One small step at a time.

Now, time to go home. I think my wife is preparing some mee rebus for dinner.

Piala II

Alhamdulillah.

Satu per satu. 

Milik Allah SWT segala pujian dan sembahan makhluk sekelian alam. 

Muta'akhir, aku semakin berminat dgn Paediatric. I think I can do it. 

I know some of you would roll your eyes in disbelief, particularly if you have read my earlier entries; that I have changed my interest for lots of times! From this to that and what not. 

It can't be helped, I guess. I'm still exploring and trying. The game is still young. I have to die-try to know. I'm not a genius; I'm just a guy who would learn from making mistakes and taking risks. Loads of them. Before I can make a correct decision I have to make ten of unwise and stupid ones.  

As such, it takes me awhile to decide; and yes, this might not turn out to be the right one after all; for all you know. 

Dear God, guide me. Let me not go astray. Let me not go to the path of shame and destruction. 

I have made my application into the paediatric training position next year. I have to go for interviews first. And it would not be until the end of September before I might hear anything from them. 

In the mean time, the hospital has just recently (this afternoon actually) agreed to sponsor my Advance Paediatric Life Support (APLS) course. Alhamdulillah. The HR workforce lady rang me and told me the jolly good news. 

APLS is a continuous training course which aims to, as the name implies, train candidates for managing emergency cases in children and babies. It serves both as an education course and a certificate examination. Holding the certificate would certainly helps in improving your credentials in applying for advance paediatric training. 

The available spots are limited and the cost is more than two thousand dollars (I was told). That's why I'm so happy they finally granted my application. 

Next in the tick-box list would be to secure the training position, apply for postgraduate certificate in child health (DCH, University of Sydney) and take the royal college exams before admitted as a fellow (FRACP). But that is still a long way to go. 

Please include me in your du'as dear readers (if any). It's hard and competitive. 

One small step at a time. InshaAllah.

If my wife reads this; I am doing this for our family. Take my hand, please, and let us walk this road together.

Kempen lintas jalan dengan selamat.

Mudah

Ramai yang kata 'Agama Islam ini Mudah'. Setiap kali aku jumpa dgn frasa ini, terbit satu perasaan tak senang dan gelisah dalam hati aku. 

Aku rasa tak setuju dgn perkataan 'mudah'.  Melainkan ada ayat suci Al-quran atau hadis Rasul SAW yg spesifik berkata demikian. 

Kalau mudah, tak akan ada susah payah, perit jerih dlm mempertahankan aqidah ini. Lihatlah sirah, terokailah sejarah. Membaca Al-quran pun hatta ada cara-caranya, dan menerbitkan hukum pula begitu ketat disiplin ilmunya. 

Barangkali perkataan yg lebih sesuai adalah 'jelas'. 

Tapi, bila fikir-fikir balik, it is somewhat 'mudah' juga, kerana semuanya sudah jelas dan nyata, sudah diperihalkan dan diperincikan segenap aspek. Jadi, 'mudah'. 

In a way, perhaps. 

Random thoughts while feeding the hospital turtles yang tak puasa. 

Posted from iOS.

Piala

Dah lama tak nampak tiang gol. Kadang-kadang, buat-buat tak nampak. Most of the time, tak nak nampak pun.

Kalau nampak, tak tahu macam mana nak sumbat gol. Kadang-kadang, bila dah tahu, tak mahu pula. Most of the time, tengok saja member lain yang sumbat gol.

Sekali imbas, macam kiasu.

Memang pun.

Tapi, kadang-kadang, tertanya pada diri. Sanggupkah hanya duduk termanggu, sambil tengok orang lain julang piala?

Apa dia?

Ya?

Tak sanggup.

Let's move on.

Saum

With only one more day to go, I'm wishing all muslims a very good and barakah Ramadhan.

Water under the bridge, and everyday is a new day.

Rise up, and shine.

Tahrir and Tamarud

Coorperation would only last as long as the status quo of those involved remain unchanged.

Patrick Gates, National Treasure.


My solidarity for Mr. President of Egypt, Dr. Mursi.

A point that I humbly urge my fellow countrymen to deeply ponder.

Fender

Aku ada sebuah gitar kapok. Tak terer main pun. Main untuk diri sendiri sahaja. Biasanya lepas balik kerja, atau pun hujung minggu, aku main dalam sejam dua, sekali -sekala. Saja, untuk santai-santai. Lagu-lagu pun tak banyak berubah; apa yang aku main waktu sekolah dulu, itu lah yang aku main sekarang. Takda geng dah.

Dua minggu lepas, aku beri gitar itu pada member. Kadang-kadang, tangan rasa 'gatal'. Rindu kot. Tak apalah. Gitar itu lebih diperlukan di sana. 

Syahrul Qur'an

القابض

Al-Qabid, nama suci Allah SWT, nama yang ke-20 mengikut susunan nasyid Asma'ul Husna, membawa erti 'Yang Maha Menyempitkan( makhluknya )' atau 'The Restrainer' dalam Bahasa Inggeris.

Menurut susunan nama dalam nasyid berkenaan juga, Al-Qabid didahului oleh Nama-nama suci seperti Al-Wahhab, Al-Razzaq dan Al-Fattah yang memberi erti Yang Maha Pemberi Kurnia, Yang Maha Pemberi Rezeki dan Yang Maha Pembuka Rahmat respectively. 

Selepas Al-Qabid, nama-nama suci Al-Basit (Yang Maha Melapangkan), Al-Khafid (Yang Maha Merendahkan), Al-Rafik (Yang Maha Meninggikan), Al-Muiz (Yang Maha Memuliakan) dan Al-Muzil (Yang Maha Menghinakan) pula menyusul.

Maha suci Allah SWT. Milik Engkaulah segala kebijaksanaan, dan milik Engkau jugalah segala pujian.

Point aku kali ini ringkas shj, (bukanlah di namakan point kalau kompleks, by the way); minta lah pada Tuhan-Mu. Apa jua. Tuhan-Mu tidak pernah jemu mendengar segala rayuan, sehingga hambaNya sendiri jemu meminta.

Juga, mengambil semangat persiapan menyambut bulan rahmah dan berkah, bulan Ramadhan. Dulu, waktu solat tarawikh di university, selang masa selepas rakaat ke 8 selalunya di-isi dengan kuliah ringkas Tauhid Asma' wa Sifat; penerangan tentang nama, maksud dan bagaimana dengan mengimani nama dan dzat-dzat Allah SWT mampu menjadi suluh pedoman hidup Muslim/Muslimah.

Allah humma balighna Ramadhan.

Sketch

I know not

" This was my great turning point.

But, in a strange way, selling the cello was a relief.

I felt freed from the ties that had bound me for so long.

What I'd always taken as my dream maybe hadn't been one after all."

Daigo Kobayashi, Okuribito(Departures) .

"..but perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah SWT Knows, while you know not."

Al-Baqarah 2:216

Kerja

Andai ada kemahiran/skill kerja asas yang ingin aku syorkan pada anda semua, ia adalah;

1. ability to prioritize task and problem - fiqh al-awlawiyat

2. ability to function in and as a group - musyawwarah

3. ability to pause and reflect before, upon and after making a decision - muhasabah

Macam mana nak kuasai kemahiran ini? Ikhlaskan niat, jangan malu bertanya dan belajar dari kesilapan dan pengalaman.

Wallahua'alam.

She is coming!

My wife's coming next week. I can't wait.

It's almost winter now, with few sub-zero temperatures recorded in the recent nights. Hopefully she will find the transition from the tropics to a relatively cooler climate easy. 

Regardless, I have made a few precautionary measure; I have fitted the rooms with more gas heater, a proper outdoor hiking sleeping bag, winter clothing and cold/flu medicines. I'm sure with the sleeping bag that I've bought, she can even sleep comfortably in the poles.

I asked her not to bring any food or herbs just to ease her during the CIQ inspection. It can be quite tedious and troublesome. We can do the shopping later anyway. 

Few sight-seeing spots I have aimed to go while she's here, along with the usual shopping avenues. I'm still contemplating whether to bring her to the Philip Island or the Great Ocean Road. The ocean scenery in both place are exhilarating and breath-taking, but extremely cold and windy with the antartic breeze during winters. I'll see how she cope first and then decide later.

I've also planned to bring her to meet the local community around here. Few Malaysian and local Muslim families have invited us for dinner and etc.

And perhaps, if we have time, and when I'm off work, we can sit in front of the fire-place with hot coffee and just talk for hours, catching up with our lives. We can sit together and recite the Holy Qur'an after the Subuh prayer and later watch the morning sky as the sun rise slowly from the horizon. We can go to the lake and walk in the cool evening breeze, and tell each other funny stories about our work-live.

Dear God, I can't wait. 

New Life

ربي يسر ولا تعسر ,ربي تمم بالخي

Rabbi yasir wala tu'asir, Rabbi tamim bil khayr.



Dear beloved child, Ummi and Abi shall be waiting.